Hi everyone, Katie here.
Yesterday all charges against me in death case of Mabel Mouse were officially dropped. I just love pointing the paw at someone else. But GLOGIRLY???
Wally Island Cat, Chief Medical Examiner assigned to the case, released the autopsy report just this morning. His findings indicate that Mabel died in fact from natural causes. Negative toxicology tests further substantiated his conclusion: Mabel suffered acute myocardial infarction. A heart attack.
Wally has not been able to determine if Mabel had a history of heart disease or if a sudden trauma or scare would have caused her pea-sized heart to stop.
In a dramatic twist, a new suspect in the case has been charged with Obstruction of Justice. Secretly identified as a person of interest early on, GLOGIRLY has been indicted for Photoshop misconduct in relation to the case. The details of the charges include:
1. Gross manipulation of the original crime scene photographs
2. Deliberate attempt to frame seven innocent bystanders and one dog
In her own defense, Glogirly admits a shameful addiction to Photoshop and other photo editing software. She admits hiding her disease from family and friends for years. Sources indicate she was unable to stop herself from creating so many different crime scene composites that in turn implicated so many cats. And one dog.
The judge assigned to the case remarked that there is no legal precedent for this type of crime. In an unexpected and sympathetic move, he has sentenced Glogirly to a mere 40 hours of communi-cat service and mandatory attendance of PA (Photoshopaholics Anonymouse) meetings for a period of no less than six months.
All I can say is THANK COD. I knew she had a problem, but I tried to ignore it. I looked the other way every time she Photoshopped some stupid hat on me. At least now she'll get the help she needs.
Besides, I was NOT digging my incarceration fashion statement.