Friday, May 18, 2012

Eye Q

"Einstein may be smarter than me, but I'm WAY cuter." -Katie

Hi everyone, Katie here.

So I just took the What Is Your Cat's IQ test on Webvet's blog.  All I can say is... IT WAS RIGGED.
And I am spitting MAD.

It started innocently enough.  Kind of like those Cosmo-Are-You-Good-Girl-Hot-Or-Bad-Girl-Hot quizzes.  Simple questions and multiple choice answers.  Easy peasey, Japaneasy.  The questions are directed to humans about their cats and believe you me, I made sure Glogirly completed every question accurately and to MY approval.

I thought I had this baby nailed.
To my horror, this was not the case. At all.

How often does your cat persuade you to get out of bed early to fix her/him breakfast?
a) Never
b) Once in a while
c) Every day

My answer:  a) Never. Duh.
I am smart enough to know that if I let my girl sleep as late as she likes, there is a far greater chance of scoring some salmon come feeding time. A well-rested Glogirly makes for a well-fed Katie. Is this not an excellent example of deductive reasoning?

Webvet's high scoring answer?  c) Everyday.
Any cat who would answer C is just flirting with starvation.

How often do you come home from work to discover your cat has gotten into mischief while you were away?
a) Never
b) Now and then
c) All the time

My answer:  a) Never. DUH.
First off, I KNOW the difference between right and wrong, what's allowed and not. Sofa YES, kitchen counter NO. Second and most important to my case, I'm CERTAINLY not stupid enough to leave any evidence of wrongdoing in plain view.

Webvet's high scoring answer? c) All the time.
Any cat incapable of hiding their own mischief...well, they're not a cat.  They're a DOG.

The questions go on and on.  Each one a virtual land mine laying in wait.
Even the scoring is backwards.
You only get points for C answers.
B answers get you nothing.
A answers get you NEGATIVE points. Huh?

Out of 20 possible points, my score is 1.  That's right, ONE.

I guess I should be happy I don't have a negative IQ.
Can't say as much for my attitude quotient.


  1. 1 is just a number. We say poo on that test! You are easily one of the smartest kittehz we know! xoxo

  2. So that means your Number 1...right?

    The Florida Furkids and Lexi

  3. Um... did you really think humans would manage to offer a decent test? I mean really. This is about training them. Clearly some other cat failed the human training test so they had the wrong answers. I mean why bother trying to wake the woman up in the morning? Ichiro does it in the middle of the night...

  4. It sounds to me like they took a dog test and just substituted "Cat" where "Dog" was. Cats are just too subtle for that. We break the rules all the time, and no one is the wiser! Let the beans think what they want and then everyone is happy.

  5. of course you point is one! that's for being number 1 :)

  6. I could not answer all the questions for the test! For example, I am not food motivated (food does not equal smarts) so yeah, I sleep in most days and sometimes I get up AFTER my human. And she comes and goes as she pleases so of course, I don't wait for her to come home to greet her - that would be boring, since I would not know when she'd return (although I do greet her if I am hungry - I can hear her car. I mean, duh). But I get what I want out of her, and I think that's what counts.

    I should give Boodie the test, though - I bet she DOES wind up in the negative column!

  7. BTW, #19? Once when my human was especially lax about the litter box, I stomped into our office and gave her a hard look. Then I made her follow me all the way down to the litter box so she could see for herself how disgusting it was! I did NOT see that one among the answers.

  8. E there ...... I do not believe in testing - I greet all the cats in the world :))

  9. BOL! Um Katie that was a DOG IQ Test Hardy Har Har...we know if we just sit there and give the peeps that big ol' 'aren't I the cutest thing on earth' look, we can get away with anything ;) If you'd like I'll use the Pointer in me to give you some pointers before you take the next test ;) You're hilarious! :D

    Waggin at ya,

  10. Humans creating a test for us cats? That must be the biggest joke ever!

  11. Well Scylla would have probably gotten a very high score. She gets the Daddy up early all the time, the clever Mom ignores her. Scylla is also very destructive Daddy is always threatening to turn her into a outside only cat especially when she sprays on their bed. Now personally we don't think these are good things and Scylla seems to stupid to figure out we only get treats when Mommy gets to sleep as long as she wants and that she just may spray one time to many and the Dad may make good on his threat. BTW Fenris (the dog) is far smarter then Scylla he never wakes the humans up and he is very well behaved and never gets into anything he isn't suppose to. Apparently the human that created the test was mentally challenged like our Daddy. Being woke up by your cat is not a good thing, getting up only encourages them to wake you up more. It's not rocket science. And cats humans that are woke up are grumpy, grumpy humans = no treats. If only we cold explain this to Scylla. ~ Arty Mouse, Socks & Fenris

  12. Between us, we'd probably score fairly high too. The mom says we're actually very good boys, for the most part. But we DO get her by up 4AM every day, 365/366 days a year. Of course, she leaves for work around 6AM anyway, so she has to get up. LOL.

    Still, the whole concept of a human designing an intelligence test for a non-human is absurd. Truly. Talk about arrogant and species-centric!

  13. Katie, we agree! Most of the questions didn't even apply to our household! We don't have an electric can opener. Our mom works at home, and even when she's away and doesn't come home at a regular time, we know, duh! Nothing wakes our mom until she's darned good and ready to wake up, even all of us all together pulling the covers off her and gently chewing on her fingers and playing on the bed--we do that after we see she's awake to encourage her to get out of bed. When we want her to go upstairs to turn on the bathroom sink faucet, we all sit on the corner of the table at the foot of the steps and look hopeful and she gets it right away! And who wants to learn tricks?!

  14. I think the test was rigged by the dogs - ya, it would be just like them to alter their test and turn it into a rigged test for us cats. We are too smart to catch on to their tricks.

  15. don't worry. your report card looks a lot like mine looked when i was in school.

  16. Oh Katie, Katie,

    Where do I start with this one?

    Option A - I rib you endlessly and probably loose my job as your Bodyguard


    Option B - Try my hardest to be sympathetic to your distress and keep my job

    I'm all for keeping it real, so I'm just gonna tell you I'm impressed with your cover up skills on the Mischief - very cool buddy, but I suspect the author of this test may have been up to some Mischief and may actually have been a DOG? Tee Hee

    Your pal Snoopy :)

    PS - I'm trying so hard not to laugh my tail off!! :)

  17. Of course a test written by humans, taken by humans does not work. Humans are not smart enough to figure us cats out!

  18. A cat IQ test, written by humans? Seriously, what good is that???

  19. Everyone knows you are brilliant and always right, lovely Katie and since that test was done by humans, well, who really cares anyway??...Happy Friday and have a fun weekend, sweet friend...xoxo...Calle, Halle, Sukki

  20. We think that test is bogus!

  21. Don't worry...who cares what humans think, right?

  22. Katie! ONE means you are number ONE!!! That is the highest score you can get! Youz is at the top of the scoring chart! Youz is brilliant :) It's all in the interpretation Baby!! :p

    the critters in The Cottage xo

  23. BUT!!!! Those are a bunch of stoooppiddd questions!!

    I mean question 1 should have been “How often does your cat get you out of bed?

    Question 2 How often do you come home from work?

    I mean it’s not rocket science. Dumb whackos setting the questions!!!

    kind regards
    Austin 🐱

  24. Beautiful Katie! It's not a proper IQ Test if there are no treats involved!

    Take care

  25. Completely ridiculous - we agree that it is rigged. Our cats scored as being average??!!!! Anyone brave enough to come over and break the news to Zoey. Completely preposterous and we will have none of it! You are always number one in our book Katie, unless you come by to visit, then you would be number 8. xoxox

  26. its obviously fixed
    Benny & Lily

  27. Purrsonally I think Mario is right, and besides, everyone knows you are on smart gal!

  28. Totally whack, Katie...that's all we can say. We don't bother to take these stupid tests!

  29. You got a 1?!! Hmmpff...Mario is right. Obviously that test was written by a dawg!

  30. Definitely a dog test... some dog put that up there on the web...

  31. Your answer for Exhibit B was exactly the same as what I would have said. THEY'RE A DOG. I am just certain that this test was written by dogs only to support their ludicrous ideas that Cats rule the world. Which of course, we don't. Proof? There's still dogs...

    Ms. Stella O'Houligan

  32. Your answer for Exhibit B was exactly the same as what I would have said. THEY'RE A DOG. I am just certain that this test was written by dogs only to support their ludicrous ideas that Cats rule the world. Which of course, we don't. Proof? There's still dogs...

    Ms. Stella O'Houligan

  33. I LOVE this test! It gave me a point for playing with SOCKS!!! All super smart kitties play with socks, right? The smellier the better.


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