Friday, April 10, 2015

Plucked from the Headlines: A Chicken Whodunnit

Breaking News
Facebook was all aflutter yesterday with news of a Toledo KFC chicken heist. According to the Toledo Police Department, *someone* made off with hundreds of family-sized-buckets worth of chicken from a local KFC. The unknown *suspect* or suspects broke into a refrigerated storage shed before they "flew the coop with $3,000 worth of chicken."  

This is the stuff of which blockbuster movies are made. "Chicken Impossible" perhaps? Coming to a big screen near you!

The news broke fast, making headlines across the country. ... or at least in Toledo.



"Pounds of poultry plucked from Toledo KFC."
NBC24 Toledo

"Thieves flew the coop with $3,000 in KFC chicken."
Fox10 TV Toledo

"Mmmmm... Chicken & Waffles."
Annonymous



Swirling Suspicions
Meanwhile back in Minneapolis, fans of the GLOGIRLY cat blog are connecting the dots. Waffles, an orange tabby with sticky paws and a well-documented chicken obsession, has been seen breaking into cupboards, cabinets and closets. It's true he often ends up locking himself inside, but he's been hard at work purr-fecting his tradecraft. 


So where WAS Waffles yesterday?
Sources indicate Glogirly was busy working on taxes yesterday and barely had time to feed Waffles and fellow Townhouse cat Katie. Yet Waffles' breath is rumored to smell like 11 secret herbs and spices. Coincidence? 


Waffles has declined to comment and is asking for privacy amidst the accusations and innuendos.  Privacy??? Since when?

31 comments:

  1. Is that a burp I hear? Is that the regurgitated odor of extra crunchy hanging in the air?

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  2. I knew it!!! Are you going to share any of the loot with Ashton to help get her chicken emporium off the ground?

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  3. We knew it! Come on, Waffles. Share your secret for nabbing that "paw-lickin' good chicken"

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  4. Hmmm... I don't think just ONE kitty could have pulled this off! I think Waffles may have teamed up with a certain Florida cat who has been planning a chicken "emporium"...

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  5. Just as we suspected... the headlines reached Australian shores this morning and Amber instantly pointed her orange paw at Waffles. Secretly, I think she wished she lived closer so she could have joined him on his chicken run!

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  6. Summer may be right! Could this be teamwork from Waffles???

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  8. Thanks for taking the fall for this one, Waff. *licks lips* I owe you one! - Ashton

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  9. WAFFLES done it. There's no question who IS he guilty party. The question is...DID WAFFLES HAVE HELP? Agree with Summer that this may not have been done by one cat.

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  10. How far is it from Minneapolis to Toledo? Could it have been done?

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  11. Waffles, you coulda hid out with that chicken here on our island...we're only about 30 miles from that KFC! :)

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  12. Did he have help??? Was the chick-hen tasty?? Inquiring minds want to know..... (not that we suspect Waffles or anything....)

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  13. Admit nothing. They don't do feline DNA and paw prints yet... They'll never catch you.. I'm sure I saw you around the townhouse. We talked right?

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  14. Uh-oh. It's not looking good, buddy! Remember to say nothing!

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  15. You can always plead insanity Waffles! The whole world knows how us cats get when we are hungry!

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  16. Hope you hid that chicken good Waffles.
    Sue B

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  17. We knew it ! Who was with you, Waffles ? Purrs

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  18. Oh, sure. Blame Waffles. He's INNOCENT! Innocent, I tell ya!
    Waffles - if you need a good attorney, let me know.
    Yours sincerely,
    Margaret Thatcher

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  19. Waffles, hopefully Katie can give you an alibi. Otherwise you might be looking at some jail time.

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  20. Hey dude let your lawyer speak for you ,xx Speedy

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  21. Whattada do with all that chicken Waffles? MOL

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  22. We're sure it was ANOTHER cat=wink, wink, but we hope Katie alibis you, silly boy!!....Happy weekend ahead, sweeties...xoxo...Calle, Halle, Sukki, Mommy Cat, Daddy Cat

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  23. If any body could pull that heist off...just saying.

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  24. Innocent until proven guilty Waffles. If there's no evidence they can't pin it on you.

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  25. Holy Cats!! This happened seriously like two miles from my house!!! When I heard the news I had no idea it might be connected to a certain Orange Menace! And Leo had disappeared for several hours that day.. Now, he has a well known aversion to human food and especially chicken (probably because it was his nemesis, Star's fav) so the question is... Did he lure Waffles here to order to rid OUR city of his most hated substance? Na... That's crazy.. right? Excuse me, I have to go examine Leo's paws for left over batter traces..

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  26. Waffles, your alibi is that you came to visit me. We played tub hockey all day!

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  27. Chicken Impossible and Mmmm...Chicken & Waffles cracked us up. So clever. Wonder where the thief has stashed his stash? We are having a giveaway for a great book. Stop by our Friday post to enter. XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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  28. You can hide out here Waffles..just bring some of that chicken in case I get hungry..er..you get hungry..

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  29. HAH! Ashton has a “wing” man and yes, that was a pun. Heh heh.

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